The public example keeps one published Task 2 essay continuous across four criterion scores, essay evidence, an estimated eight-minute 60–180-word revision, and a five-level before-and-after assessment.
The band range is diagnostic guidance, not an official IELTS score; no score improvement is promised.
You first see the essay location behind the main blocker, then an AI-generated test rewrite submitted by an internal test account for that same target.
The judgment retains before/after summaries and evidence references so the conclusion can be checked.
First of all, technology saves a lot of time in our daily life. For example, when we go to a new place, we do not need to ask people or remember the way, we just use the map App on the phone. Besides, we can pay by phone, buy things online and talk with friends who is far away from us. These things were very difficult in the past, but now everyone can do it easily.
On the one hand, technology has made our daily life much simpler and more convenient in many ways. First of all, it saves a lot of time in our daily life. For example, when we go to a new place, we do not need to ask people or remember the way, we just use the map App on the phone. Besides, we can pay by phone, buy things online and talk with friends who are far away from us. These things were very difficult in the past, but now everyone can do them easily.
Body paragraph role is unclear
Make the paragraph’s job clear before moving into its examples.
The blocker clearly moved
The submitted revision successfully added a clear topic sentence at the beginning of the paragraph ('On the one hand, technology has made our daily life much simpler and more convenient in many ways.') that explicitly states the paragraph's role in addressing the first view of the prompt.
The original paragraph began directly with a specific supporting point ('First of all, technology saves a lot of time...') without a broader topic sentence to establish the paragraph's overall role in the essay.
The rewritten paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that outlines the paragraph's purpose, effectively introducing the discussion on how technology makes life simpler and more convenient before providing specific examples.
Read the essay evidence and public repair focus before comparing the rewrite, with no need to guess what changed.
Use the same method on one of your paragraphs: locate evidence, complete the target revision, and review the before-and-after change.
The public example keeps one published Task 2 essay continuous across four criterion scores, essay evidence, an estimated eight-minute 60–180-word revision, and a five-level before-and-after assessment.
You first see the essay location behind the main blocker, then an AI-generated test rewrite submitted by an internal test account for that same target.
The judgment retains before/after summaries and evidence references so the conclusion can be checked. Use the same method on one of your paragraphs: locate evidence, complete the target revision, and review the before-and-after change.
Banfen Writing focuses on targeted score-gap repair. Use a real essay to pinpoint your conservative band range, core blockers, text evidence, and next revision steps.
These pages explain the Banfen Writing diagnostic and blocker-repair method, Task 1 overview, Task 2 development, and common score blockers.
Submit the prompt and essay to get the main blocker, essay evidence, and next revision target.
More than a simple comment list. Identify the priority blocker in your draft and guide you to revise with proven results.
