Common mistake
Putting three ideas into one paragraph with one sentence each makes development thin.
Writing problem breakdown
A body paragraph should prove one judgement.
Break the problem into one blocker, one piece of diagnostic evidence, and one next revision target first. The smaller the problem, the more focused the revision becomes.
Make the problem smaller first so revision can actually focus.
Real IELTS essay diagnosis
First of all, technology saves a lot of time in our daily life. For example, when we go to a new place, we do not need to ask people or remember the way, we just use the map App on the phone. Besides, we can pay by phone, buy things online and talk with friend…
Marked line: where the diagnosis located the main blocker in this learner-written essay.Coherence & cohesion 6
Main blocker
Body paragraph role is unclear
6–7conservative band range
268 words
Sample diagnostic, not an official IELTS score.
Diagnostic evidence
If the example is not explained as evidence for the claim, the paragraph is unfinished.
What to confirm before writing
Write topic sentence, reason, example, and so what first.
What to revise in the next version
Rewrite one body paragraph and merge half-developed points into one complete chain.
- Whether the topic sentence can be proven
- Whether reason explains cause
- Whether the example is linked back
FAQ
What problem does Task 2 body paragraph solve?
Break the problem into one blocker, one piece of diagnostic evidence, and one next revision target first. The smaller the problem, the more focused the revision becomes.
Is Task 2 body paragraph an AI essay checker?
Banfen Writing focuses on targeted score-gap repair. Use a real essay to pinpoint your conservative band range, core blockers, text evidence, and next revision steps.
Guides
Keep going with these guides.
These pages explain the Banfen Writing diagnostic and blocker-repair method, Task 1 overview, Task 2 development, and common score blockers.
Home
雅思写作批改看懂了，下一篇还是不会改？提交一篇真实 IELTS Task 2，先看保守参考分数区间、主卡分点和原文证据；由你自己重写一段、完成整篇第二稿，再对比修改前后变化。首次合格诊断免费；确认确有主卡分点后，可一次性选择 7 天 ¥29 或 31 天 ¥99 写作修复期，一次只进行 1 轮且不自动续费。
Writing guides
按正在写的题目查找雅思写作指南：小作文图型、overview 与数据取舍，大作文题型、立场与主体段展开，以及批改后的同题重写步骤。每篇指南都要求你回到自己的作文验证一个具体改动。
Writing checker
使用 IELTS Writing checker 时，不要只看一个分数。更有用的是找出 Task Response、Coherence、Lexical Resource 或 Grammar 中最影响训练的主卡分点。
Chinese writing correction
雅思写作批改不应只改语法、替换高级词或给一篇标准范文。先基于完整题目与原文，判断 Task Response、Coherence、Lexical Resource 或 Grammar 中最影响目标分的主卡分点，引用对应句段，再把反馈收窄成下一版可验证的段落重写目标。学习者自己完成修改，才能判断证据是否改善并迁移到下一篇
Chinese band descriptors
雅思写作评分标准包括 Task Response、Coherence、Lexical Resource 和 Grammar。重写时要先找主卡分点。
Task 2 development
Task 2 分数卡住常见原因是观点没有发展成完整论证链。了解薄展开为什么压分，以及下一步该重写哪个动作。
Chinese Task 2 examples
雅思大作文例子要连接 reason 和 consequence，避免只列名人、国家或个人经历。
Task 2 examples
Task 2 的例子要和 claim、reason、consequence 连在一起，才能支撑论证。
Cause effect sample
雅思大作文原因影响范文应区分 cause、effect 和 example，避免主体段方向混乱。
Chinese Task 2 conclusion
雅思大作文结尾应回到题目、立场和比较标准，避免只重复开头句。
Chinese Task 2 correction
雅思大作文批改应先判断题目回应、立场稳定和主体段展开，而不是只改语言。
Start diagnosis
Use one real essay to find the main blocker.
Submit the prompt and essay, find the criterion that most affects the score, then decide which paragraph to rewrite.
More than a simple comment list. Identify the priority blocker in your draft and guide you to revise with proven results.
References