One report gives TR, CC, LR, and GRA criterion scores, then connects the main blocker to essay evidence and a 60–180-word revision; a five-level before-and-after assessment records what changed.
The band range is diagnostic guidance, not an official IELTS score; no score improvement is promised.
First of all, technology saves a lot of time in our daily life. For example, when we go to a new place, we do not need to ask people or remember the way, we just use the map App on the phone. Besides, we can pay by phone, buy things online and talk with friends who is far away from us. These things were very difficult in the past, but now everyone can do it easily.
On the one hand, technology has made our daily life much simpler and more convenient in many ways. First of all, it saves a lot of time in our daily life. For example, when we go to a new place, we do not need to ask people or remember the way, we just use the map App on the phone. Besides, we can pay by phone, buy things online and talk with friends who are far away from us. These things were very difficult in the past, but now everyone can do them easily.
Body paragraph role is unclear
Make the paragraph’s job clear before moving into its examples.
The blocker clearly moved
The submitted revision successfully added a clear topic sentence at the beginning of the paragraph ('On the one hand, technology has made our daily life much simpler and more convenient in many ways.') that explicitly states the paragraph's role in addressing the first view of the prompt.
The original paragraph began directly with a specific supporting point ('First of all, technology saves a lot of time...') without a broader topic sentence to establish the paragraph's overall role in the essay.
The rewritten paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that outlines the paragraph's purpose, effectively introducing the discussion on how technology makes life simpler and more convenient before providing specific examples.
Lock one main blocker and its essay location before rewriting the same paragraph, so the revision scope stays clear.
The public sample preserves the original, revision, before-and-after assessment, and evidence for traceability.
Prepare the prompt, full response, and target band so the four-criterion diagnosis can locate evidence in the essay.
Complete one 60–180-word same-paragraph revision focused on the main blocker, then read the before-and-after assessment.
One report gives TR, CC, LR, and GRA criterion scores, then connects the main blocker to essay evidence and a 60–180-word revision; a five-level before-and-after assessment records what changed.
Banfen Writing focuses on targeted score-gap repair. Use a real essay to pinpoint your conservative band range, core blockers, text evidence, and next revision steps.
These pages explain the Banfen Writing diagnostic and blocker-repair method, Task 1 overview, Task 2 development, and common score blockers.
Submit one Task 1 or Task 2 response and get the main blocker, evidence sentence, and next revision target first.
More than a simple comment list. Identify the priority blocker in your draft and guide you to revise with proven results.
